That's About the Size of Things

The big and small moments of 2008 in Philadelphia.

by PW Staff

The year began with a bang in Philadelphia. So many people fired into the air immediately after the clock stuck midnight that 911 received 257 calls about gunfire. It was contagious, with police firing into a house, grazing a 9-year-old boy and putting a 33-year-old in a coma.

It was an auspicious start of the new year, one that became bigger, dumber and more Philly than anyone could’ve imagined.

Citizens lined up around City Hall to shake hands with the new mayor. Nutter was then inaugurated and celebrated by covering “Rapper’s Delight.” The Daily News ran a headline that read, “NOT WORTH THE INK IT’S WRITTEN WITH.” KYW-TV ran one that said, “RENDELL NAMES DOG LAW ENFORCEMENT DIRECTOR.”

Dennis Kucinich finished second in a straw poll at Central High School. A reality show about the Parking Authority debuted on A&E. Larry Mendte read the announcement of Alycia Lane’s firing. Beanie Sigel was sent to a halfway house due to a mention in the Daily News’ gossip column.

A museum honoring departed hero/horse Barbaro was cancelled. On a reality show, Miss Pennsylvania couldn’t identify the state flag. Announcements were made: The price of the Inquirer and Daily News would go to 75 cents each; Alycia Lane didn’t lose her virginity until she was 23. A man asked KYW-AM’s John McDevitt: “Are you trying to pimp me for a pie?”

And all of that was just in the first month.

Sometimes the big moments tended to overshadow the little stuff that was just as entertaining. As 2008 draws to a close, PW looks at the big and small.

Big moment:
Four police officers are killed, creating waves of grief across city.

Small moment:
The police department website posts videos of Phillies-related vandals. Keep your eyes out for guys in red hats.

Big moment:
Thomas Scantling viciously assaults sleeping passenger Dewayne Taylor on SEPTA with a hammer. A compassionate bystander steals Taylor’s cell phone.

Small moment:
SEPTA installs token machine at busy 52nd Street station. Given the reliability of other SEPTA token machines, it might take a hammer to get this one to work.

Big moment:
Starbucks employee Sean Patrick Conroy is beaten by teens in a Center City subway station, and dies of an asthma attack.

Small moment:
Starbucks has city’s Zipcars drive around with magnetized coffee cups on their roofs, hoping to “reward good Samaritans in Philadelphia” who warn drivers. Uh, Starbucks? Four words: Dewayne Taylor’s cell phone.

Big moment:
Homicide drops by 16 percent.

Small moment:
Larry Mendte gets home arrest and becomes mildly addicted to Knight Rider.

Big moment:
Sarah Palin drops puck at Flyers game, gets booed.

Small moment:
Sarah Palin wears Rangers jersey in Philly, gets booed.

Big moment:
Hillary wins Pennsylvania primary.

Small moment:
Obama eats crow—and a cheesesteak.

Big moment:
Obama makes historic speech on race at National Constitution Center, heralding racial equality.

Small moment:
Sidewalk hawkers sell Obama/Phillies hats, heralding politico-sporting equality.

Big moment:
Obama wins Pennsylvania in general election, with Philadelphians taking the lead in the vote.

Small moment:
Philadelphians vote yes on ballot question regarding the parks service, having no idea why they voted that way.

Big moment:
Philllies win world championship.

Small moment:
Philadelphia Soul wins world championship. Jon Bon Jovi wishes it were a big moment.

Big moment:
Demolition of the Spectrum is announced.

Small moment:
Demolition of Mo Cheeks is announced.

Big moment:
Fumo, at long last, is indicted for corruption.

Small moment:
The closure of the Fumo Family Branch Library is announced; now the senator’s fans won’t have to return all those overdue books about graft.

Big moment:
Nutter announces budget cuts; city goes ballistic.

Small moment:
Nutter throws out first pitch at Phillies game with shirt tucked in; city doesn’t go ballistic, but should.

Big moment:
Tina Fey, from Upper Darby, shoots into the stratosphere with Sarah Palin imitation and new 30 Rock season.

Small moment:
Pink, from Doylestown, writes on her website: “P!nk is Kind of a Big Deal!” Way to self-promote, homegirl.

Big moment:
Wireless Philadelphia dies another death.

Small moment
Wireless Philadelphia dies another death.

Big moment:
Sarah Palin watches presidential debates at Irish Pub.

Small moment:
Sarah Palin debates whether winking and saying, “You betcha” to drunk local patrons is really a good idea.

Big moment:
Michael Smerconish declares his support for Obama.

Small moment:
Inquirer editorial board endorses both McCain and Obama, thereby making endorsements pointless.

Big moment:
Milton Street gets 30 months in prison.

Small moment:
John Street removes his brother from his iPhone.

Big moment:
Former Inquirer columnist John Grogan’s Marley & Me gets made into a movie that’s filmed in Philadelphia

Small moment:
Philadelphia journalist schadenfreude sets fire to Owen Wilson’s hair.

Big moment:
The Roots host the Roots Picnic, bringing Gnarls Barkley, Santogold and Diplo together in a triumphant Philadelphia concert.

Small moment:
The Roots become the house band for Jimmy Fallon. Not Jimmy Kimmel. Jimmy Fallon.

Big moment:
Philly-based Pig Iron Theater Company gets a rave review in The New York Times for Chekhov Lizardbrain.

Small moment:
The Phillies’ new AAA affiliate, the Lehigh Valley IronPigs, drop the first 11 games in franchise history. They finish 33 games out of first.

Big moment:
With the arrival of the Quilts of Gee’s Bend at the art museum, Philadelphia becomes Quiltadelphia with concerts and plays celebrating a blanket

Small moment:

Little old ladies all over the city wonder why their homemade blankets aren’t publicly displayed.

Quotes of 2008

“If they bring a knife to the fight, we bring a gun, because from what I understand, folks in Philly like a good brawl. I’ve seen Eagles fans.” — Barack Obama, on the toughness of the campaign.

“HIS HANDS WERE SOFT AS BUTTER!” — Stepp Stewart, on meeting Barack Obama at a gym in Philadelphia.

“I just don’t think the world was ready to have a black president. I’m not by any means prejudiced, but … ” — Philadelphia legal secretary Amy Ridolfi, to the New York Times, making Philly look good.

“Chuck Graham, state senator, is here. Stand up, Chuck, good to see ya! Oh, God love you, what am I talking about?” — Biden at a rally in September. Graham, a Missouri state senator, is paralyzed.

“You can become a mechanic, what kind of mechanic? Air-conditioning? Listen, think about that. You can charge 75 dollars just for showing up, not having the parts and saying you’ll be back! That’s a lot of money!” — Bill Cosby on KYW-TV.

“If you see an article or story that you like, you can click it and it will be magnified for you.” — Philadelphia Tribune publisher Robert Bogle in January on the paper’s new “E-Edition.”

“A photo on Page 3 yesterday showed Conrad Veidt in ‘The Man Who Laughs,’ a 1928 silent film, not Heath Ledger as the Joker.” — A Daily News correction on Jan. 24.

“Why debate moving the Barnes Foundation? It’s a done deal! But so were slavery, segregation and the Soviet Union, once upon a time.” — Broad Street Review editor Dan Rottenberg, keeping things in perspective.

“Good sex lasts from three to 13 minutes.” — Sentence on the front page of Metro on Aug. 25 in a box labeled “Statistics.”

“It’s the most practical idea ever heard of in Philadelphia.” — Gardner Cadwalader, on his plan to build condos, casinos and Ferris wheels on islands in the Delaware.

“Certainly, there is a risk. We will create expectations, and we have to work to make sure we meet them.” — SEPTA’s Pat Nowakowski, on more buses and late-night trains.